What does my weight have to do with your opinion of me

If you’re overweight you may find that you’re treated differently than people who are considered to be of a “healthy weight.” The higher the number on the scale, the harder you may have to sell yourself as a valuable human being with admirable qualities. Do you deserve that treatment because your weight is proof that you lack intelligence and discipline?

If you’re overweight you recognize the face strangers make because your weight, and therefore you, disgust them.

Growing up I heard from my siblings, “You’re fat” in those exact words plus a number of creative ways they said the same thing. I was the youngest of 4 children, the biggest baby at birth (9 lbs 7 oz) and the only chubby child in the family. I knew I had extra rolls my sisters and brothers didn’t have but it made me mad to have them remind me.

My mother and my friends, however, would defend me and always said the opposite, “You’re not fat.” Which was it? Who was right?

I think you know the answer. I knew I was fat. My siblings were blunt, but truthful. I struck back, not very truthfully, with, “So, what? I’m fat and I can go on a diet. Whatchu gonna do about being ugly?”

My mother and my friends wanted to spare my feelings. I don’t think there is anybody who is fat and doesn’t know it. That’s not the same as being fat and not caring. There are lots of fat people who don’t care, and I for one, support their choice fully to opt out of weight loss efforts.

Why do people need to tell us we’re fat anyway? When I hear somebody defend their behavior by saying, “I did it for their own good,” I believe them as much as the guy who says, “I read Penthouse for the articles.”Yeah, sure you do… It’s a socially acceptable form of prejudice.

In fact, 94% of Americans blame fat people for being obese

I think some people tell us we’re fat because they don’t like fat people. They may want to make us aware that we’re fat so we’ll lose weight. Then they will feel okay about being seen with us as though what we weigh is a reflection on them.


There are people who openly admit they hate fat people.

There is a website called Fat People Hate. It’s as awful and as ignorant as it sounds. The people who post here feel justified hating fat people. They rant about obesity and advance prejudices and myths with no science to back up their tirades.

This is but one example of the bigotry and unfounded claims about fat people in Why I hate fat people, and why you should too

-They’re quitters. They have no willpower at all, which is one of the main reasons why they remain fat. Becoming healthy requires a lifestyle change, but they are completely unwilling to do anything beyond some short term crazy fad diet, or take some pills, or get a gastric bypass so that overeating becomes harder for them to do. They look for the easiest laziest way out, and they act like it’s not their fault when they inevitably fail.

This paragraph is so full of bigotry, myths, prejudice, and stereotypes it negates any rational argument the author might have to support his hatred for fat people. It definitely won’t convince anybody capable of thinking for themselves to hate fat people too.

The justification for hating fat people is, “they did it to themselves.” People express their disgust toward fat people whom they characterize as all being lazy liars who blame their weight on everything except their own actions.

Weight is not, by any means, just a matter of gluttony, a sign of weak character, or a indication of lack of discipline. The reasons are complex and more than just the inability to control oneself around food. Research is proving it’s more than a matter of willpower.

The Biology and Genetics of Obesity — A Century of Inquiries

Chin Jou, Ph.D.

N Engl J Med 2014; 370:1874-1877May 15, 2014DOI: 10.1056/NEJMp1400613

In the 1950s, for instance, the work of Rockefeller University’s Jules Hirsch showed that for obese people, long-term weight loss is a lifelong struggle. Hirsch found that although obese subjects could shed a substantial amount of weight through drastic calorie restriction, their metabolic rates would dip in response to calorie reductions. This effect meant, for example, that if an obese woman dropped down from 200 lb to 130 lb, she would have to consume fewer calories to remain at 130 lb than would a 130-lb counterpart whose weight had always held steady. The previously obese woman, then, required more “willpower” to maintain her reduced weight than someone who had never been obese.

I probably can’t change the opinions of people who hate fat people.

I know that, but I hope that I can reach people who are fat and either struggle with their weight, or accept it, to help them understand that they are not the ones with the problem. They don’t deserve scorn, hate, or to be ostracized. People who hate fat people are messed up and their ignorant outbursts shouldn’t be encouraged or tolerated.




Jackie Conn

About Jackie Conn

Jackie Conn is married and has four grown daughters and four grandchildren. She is a Weight Watchers success story. She's a weight loss expert with 25 years of experience guiding women and men to their weight-related goals. Her articles on weight management have been published in health, family and women's magazines. She has been a regular guest on Channel 5 WABI news, FOX network morning program Good Day Maine and 207 on WCSH.